I guess I'm officially an author

 Hello fellow humans,

I've finished writing my novel, after researching, writing and editing in the past five years. It's been a ride! Now what?

Well, I can officially say that I've written my query letter, synopsis and blurb about a dozen times. I've sent my query letter (with blurb and synopsis attached) as well as the first one to three chapters, to seven agents. Five rejections so far. 

I'll be honest with you. It doesn't feel good. When did rejection ever feel good, I can hear you say. You're right. But I had to say it, I know I'm not the only one feeling this way. After each rejection I wonder why the agent didn't like it. 

'Maybe my prologue is too strong? Too bloody? 

What about the promise, is it there? Could I change it? Make it completely different?'

No. 

Stop. 

I should NOT think about changing my first chapters, my whole book, because someone said it was not for them. For agents, finding a book that's right for them is subjective to their taste (they even point it out in their response). I need to remember that. I say it because maybe you need to remember it too. How many agents are out there? I didn't query them all. Yet.

What's the right amount before I need to think that I may need to re-work on my novel? Is there a right amount? 

Out of the five rejections, three had a nugget of advice: check tweeter for MSWL. Look at the Writers Digest guide to Literary agents. Send queries to others in the same agency, they might see something they like. 

It's not feedback, but it's helpful, I guess. I do these. My morale is a bit down. I wonder if I should put my novel in the bin. 

No. Don't. 

I have something good. I know I do. Doubt is always roaming around me, more so when I wonder at my own ability to write, to paint, to do things. Doubt's a b****. 

I think about my circle of writer friends. I reach out. It's important to have that circle. If you don't have that yet, please see where you can find a critic partner who will look at your work (and you at theirs). That support outside your friends and family is... I have no words. Amazing. Enriching. Priceless.

I guess that with those rejection letters, I'm now 'officially' an author. I'll continue to play the game. 

On these words, I hope that you stay safe and continue writing fellow humans. 

Don't give up.


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